Many men are introduced to pornography at an early age. Unfortunately, when these powerful images enter the highly impressionable, developing brain of a child or teenager, addiction can be the result.

Many young porn addicts have the mistaken belief that once they enter adulthood and a committed relationship, their fascination with pornography will cease. Many young people believe that “sex” will cure their porn addiction.

What they fail to understand is that porn addiction is literally a “brain chemical” addiction, in many ways identical to a drug addiction. Someone hooked on cocaine as a teenager, would not reasonably expect to automatically lose that desire or dependency simply because they reach legal age. Likewise, porn addiction does not magically disappear with adulthood.

But what about sex? Why would someone continue seeking out pornography when they can have sex with their partner? Why would they still have the need?

Think of it this way–would having sex eliminate a cocaine addict’s desire for their drug? Of course not, because cocaine addiction is not about sex. The same principle applies to porn addiction. Most people are completely unaware that pornography addiction is NOT about sex. Pornography creates a literal chemical dependency in the brain. The individual uses porn as a “drug-of-choice” to escape and “self-medicate” in response to any number of pressures, difficulties, needs or situations in his life. Having sex is not going to heal a chemical addiction.

It is true that sex can sometimes temporarily reduce the perceived need for pornography. Because self-pleasure and masturbation virtually always accompany porn viewing, sex can temporarily replace the fantasy images and masturbation. However, when one’s partner is simply a replacement for addiction, she can usually sense the facade. As many wives of porn addicts say, “I feel he’s just using me to masturbate. We’re not connected.”

So, sexual intimacy doesn’t replace or stop pornography addiction. The pornography simply creates problems in the relationship. And soon, sex with one partner isn’t sufficient to meet the “brain chemical” needs of the addict.

If you’re struggling under the burden of porn addiction, be careful not to fool yourself into thinking that if your partner was more sexually exciting and responsive, your problem would be solved. This makes about as much sense as believing sex would eliminate a drinking problem. You have to get on the recovery path and put in the time and effort to address the “real” underlying issues and causes of your porn use.

This is what PA is all about. We can help you move towards lasting freedom. You can break free and you can have a close, committed, wonderful relationship with your partner. But you can’t expect that person to rescue you from the work of recovery, or magically make your struggles go away. They can encourage, support and walk with you, but only you can make the commitment and get started. We’re here for you.